9

Now wait a moment here! Who was that? There’s nothing in here about waiting, and that sounded damn close to philosophy. I said there were rules here, and there bloody well will be. I will not tolerate this type of anarchy. Will I not!

There will be no outsiders intruding in the narrative. No petty dictators-in-waiting to override my Triple O status. I say who speaks and who does not. And I will get to the bottom of this, yes I will indeed. Let’s see, according to my script we have, well, me. That’s important to establish, and we damned well did. Didn’t we?

Ah yes, there’s the old sod – I will have you know I argued strenuously against including him but was overruled. But there he is and we mustn’t ’fiddle’ with the author’s intentions. Mustn’t we?

Gareth, yes; the beaver, unfortunately; bunny, yes, although he isn’t listed as Edward–must have been a late revision; and of course… ah, yes, mustn’t get ahead of ourselves. That would be a tragic misuse of narratorial powers. Wouldn’t it?

But, no, not here, dammit, how about… no, no, NO, NOT THERE EITHER! Who’s been screwing with the text? I demand to know. There WILL be rules! I demand an accounting for this outrageous deviation from the plan!

… … ….

So, that’s it, is it? Silence. I am to be thwarted? We will see about that.

Eh-hem, khem. This story is NOW about a small lad named Gary who has a red wagon and loves his GI Joe astronaut.

Let us begin: