{"id":8569,"date":"2015-02-25T12:01:37","date_gmt":"2015-02-25T19:01:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/macblaze.ca\/?p=8569"},"modified":"2015-02-23T12:23:45","modified_gmt":"2015-02-23T19:23:45","slug":"well","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/?p=8569","title":{"rendered":"Well…"},"content":{"rendered":"

Turn it sideways and it’s a tunnel?<\/p>\n

Three drums and cymbal fell off a cliff: ba-dum bum bum… crash.<\/p>\n

As previously mentioned<\/a>\u00a0I have a manilla envelope full of pre-internet jokes all typewritten…on a typewriter. Some of them I can’t ever post here (Indian Job Application, Polish Vacation Itinerary) because they are just too dated and too -ist\u2014by which I mean so very not politically correct or even acceptable. But \u00a0few still make me smile. They seem to all be predicated on the classic ‘misunderstanding.’ So here’s a typical one with a boat theme. (I left the typos in!)<\/em><\/p>\n

Once there was twin bothers named Jack and Jim. Jack was married; but Jim was single and the proud owner of an old boat. Disaster struck them both on the same day. Jack’s wife died and Jim’s boat sank. A few days later a friend mistaked Jim for Jack and offered his sympathies saying “You must feel terrible.” Jim replied “Oh. not really. She was a wreck from the beginning. Her bottom was all shrivelled up and smelled like dead fish. The first time I got in her, she made water faster than anything I’ve ever seen. There was a bad crack in her back, and a pretty big hole in her front. The hole got bigger everytime I used her, and she leaked like crazy. But what finnished her was these five guys I know who\u00a0borrowed her and I told them she wasn’t very good, but they said they’d take a chance with her anyhow. So I rented her out. Then the crazy fools tried to get into her all at once. It was too much for her and she cracked right in the middle.” At this point the friend fainted.<\/p>\n

Sigh<\/em><\/p>\n

\"IMG_4337\"<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Turn it sideways and it’s a tunnel? Three drums and cymbal fell off a cliff: ba-dum bum bum… crash. As previously mentioned\u00a0I have a manilla envelope full of pre-internet jokes all typewritten…on a typewriter. Some of them I can’t ever post here (Indian Job Application, Polish Vacation Itinerary) because they are just too dated and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[19],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8569"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8569"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8569\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8569"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=8569"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=8569"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}