{"id":1388,"date":"2010-03-26T13:36:03","date_gmt":"2010-03-26T19:36:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/macblaze.ca\/?p=1388"},"modified":"2010-03-26T13:47:16","modified_gmt":"2010-03-26T19:47:16","slug":"stolen-prose","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/?p=1388","title":{"rendered":"Stolen Prose"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Ah Leah<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>That hurts. Let me try again&#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly, a shot rang out. That&#8217;s all I have so far, courtesy of snoopy.<\/p>\n<p><em> That hurts. Let me try again&#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>She picked up a pen and stabbed her eye. The eye bled. She screamed for help, but no one heard her over the loud barking of a dog named Bruce.<\/p>\n<p><em>That hurts. Let me try again&#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>And some more. And some more, convincing her that she&#8217;d never make it to Friday.<\/p>\n<p>How&#8217;s that so far?<\/p>\n<li>Much better. Possibly even exactly what I needed. Hey, do I always have only one eye when you think about me?<\/li>\n<p><em>That hurts. Let me try again&#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Ha ha ha. Good. No, I tend to think of you with two perfectly functioning blue eyes.<\/p>\n<p>[bat , bat, bat, bat, bat]<\/p>\n<p><em>That hurts. Let me try again&#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n<li>That was enthralling. Can I write a sequel?<\/li>\n<p>Please do. I&#8217;ll be waiting.<\/p>\n<p><em>That hurts. Let me try again&#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>-Stolen from the email journals of two strange ladies&#8230;<\/strong><br \/>\n<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ah Leah That hurts. Let me try again&#8230; It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly, a shot rang out. That&#8217;s all I have so far, courtesy of snoopy. That hurts. Let me try again&#8230; She picked up a pen and stabbed her eye. The eye bled. She screamed for help, but no one heard [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1388"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1388"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1388\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1388"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1388"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macblaze.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1388"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}