Foreword then Forward
Well last year (actually this year as I write but likely last year as you read, although time is a twisty thing once you start to think about it. And now that I think about it, it may be a couple of years ago or even several. But perhaps this isn’t the time to get into it. Later, yes?) I cataloged all the books I read because Earl goaded me into it. Of course you don’t know this yet because it’s still this year and I haven’t posted the entry that will appear at the last possible seconds of the year. I’m not sure Earl actually realizes he was the author of such onerous and industrious tribulations, but it is a well-established point of legal precedence that he cannot escape responsibility through ignorance. Be all that as it may, I had once again decided to not put up any resistance to Earl’s overbearing oneupmanship and will commit to trying to equal his feets. A little bird has written me of them and while they, of course, seem less than the feets of Carmen Constantine, they are prestigious feets nonetheless. Let us now step forward towards the goal.
But alas, after consideration, this plan must fall by the wayside as it slowly has dawned on me that I have no measure with which to measure my own feets. Our — Earl’s, Carmen Constantine’s and my own — feets are separated by time and space (ah, there’s that time issue again…) and I do not believe Sylvia will allow me to separate her or Earl from those, oh-so-magnificent digits and my-they’re-so-grand extremities. But I’m pretty sure the Big C would have cooperated. Alas indeed.
Plan B, Mark 3, version 1.2b
After much pondering, mulling and general musing I have decided to buy a vowel. Two “e”s seems a bit pretentious (and while that may suit Mr. E.J. Woods’ megalomaniacal agenda, I am a much more modest sort) so I have decided to buy an “a” and thrown down the discarded “e” at the aforementioned feet (now diminished) of Woods & Co. and challenge him on the basis of his feats.
“Take that” and “Ha!”
So, by now you must be wondering just which of the many feats (because unlike his feets, he has many more than just two) of Earl J. Woods I intend to emulate and indeed, in all modesty and humility, attempt to surpass. Well, it comes often to many an Internet user’s attention that Mssr. Woods has, for the past several years, managed to post at least one post a day on his weblog: the infamous “My Name is Earl (J. Woods)”, formerly “The Bleak House of Blahgs”. Thus for both 2011 and 2012 he has managed (or will have managed in the case of the upcoming end of 2012 assuming time does not twist in on itself and disrupt a perfectly good linearity) to make 365 sequential and orderly posts.
I now announce my intent to match this feat.