Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-06-28

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For Posterity: Mr Elinski says…

Mr. Doug Elinski , Alberta MLA says:

Get used to it gents, this is your life, first grad, then engagement party, then the wedding, the birth of the kids, all about the girls. If you are lucky, then like me, you will be able at some time to take flying lessons and drive a cool pick up, but only after the girls move away and start presenting you with grandchildren.

Gah… just kill me now…

The entire post from the Google Cache:

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Grad speeches

Edmonton Calder does not have a lot a High Schools, (one exactly) but we do have several Junior High Schools and this week is the beginning of the Junior High Grad season.
I give the same speech because it is a pretty good one and the kids like
it. I like the kids, the boys, look like 14 and 15 year olds, just a
little cleaner and less apt to lean heavily to cool. The girls, are
gorgeous, not grown up but certainly getting there.
Babies with pretty satin dresses, bouffant hairdo’s trying to walk in heels
for the first time. It’s quite a leap from runners to stilettos and I
think this is a very special womanish transition that men, do not
understand. My daughters all did this and I did not understand so like
a lot of big gatherings involving food and speeches, it’s more about
the girls than the boys.

Get used to it gents, this is your life, first grad, then engagement party,
then the wedding, the birth of the kids, all about the girls. If you
are lucky, then like me, you will be able at some time to take flying
lessons and drive a cool pick up, but only after the girls move away
and start presenting you with grandchildren.

My advice to girls is even simpler:
Ladies, always smile when you walk into a room, there is nothing a man wants
less than a woman scowling because he thinks he is going to get shit
for something and has no idea what. Men are attracted to smiles, so
smile don’t give me that “treated equal” stuff, if you want equal it
comes in little packages at Starbucks.

Here is my speech, I ad lib a bit and I stole most of it but the kids love it.

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of 09 wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.

The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas
the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering
I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth, never mind.

You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth for a long time
so take a lot of pictures tonight and in 20 years you’ll look at them
and recall, in a way you can’t grasp, now how much possibility lay
before you and how fabulous you really look.

You will realize soon how cute young ladies are trying to walk in heels for the first time.

Everyone take a picture of someone right now.

You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve a math problem by chewing bubblegum.

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your
worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on Tuesday.


I for one strongly support having a personal theme song and if you want
my opinion there is nothing better than a good old Disney classic like
the Dwarf mining song, Hi Ho Hi Ho it’s off to work we go……. from
Snow White.

I sing it every day on my way into the legislature.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours. < Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself. Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell everyone you know because they won’t know. Floss, turns out the dental hygienist was right. Keep your old love letters, I suggest that in our new technology age you keep every letter someone writes you. Write someone a letter in long hand, put it in an envelope and but a stamp on it. They will cherish it forever. Stretch, turn out the Occupational therapist was right. Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't. Drink lots of milk, unless you are a Vegan, in which case take calcium. Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone. Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own. Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room. Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good. Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young. Read the directions, even if you don't follow them Live in Toronto once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Vancouver once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel. Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you will get old, and when you do you'll remember when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders. Respect your elders. Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out. Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future. Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 100. You will walk away from this step in the journey of your life with only one thing that makes you different from everyone else who is doing the same thing. You are losing your status as popular kid or weirdo and it’s going to take some getting used to because while you and some of your friends have been together since age 5, you are now starting to go your separate ways. You might be the popular kid, but I guarantee that in 30 years none of the folks in this room will remember whether you were the pretty one or not. They will just be glad to see you because when they see you they will see just a tiny little sliver of themselves and this will make them feel very good. What you leave with today is your own ability to help everyone one in this room stay connected to where they are right now. So stand up and take another picture of someone else. Good luck and thank you for letting me share my thoughts But do trust me on the sunscreen Liberated and amended heavilly in someplaces from the Class of 97 by Chicago newspaper columnist, Mary Schmich.
Posted by Doug Elniski at 7:11 AM 0 comments

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-06-21

  • #Twitteriffic bug: solved! Resume regular broadcasts #
  • Reorganizing sucks. Reorganizing files systems to match aforementioned reorganizations sucks more. #
  • When workers are managers then who gets things done? And if managers are workers, then who decides..? #
  • Making the SQL database is going to be the easy part. Getting people to use it is a cultural mystery. #
  • iPhone 3.0 installed. Cut, paste and more… #
  • Actually, php vs. .Net does make more sense after a couple bottles of wine. #
  • Apple Wiki Server: if I can get paste the permissions and DNS issues, it lolls like 50% of my knowledgebase issue is solved. #
  • The City of St. Albert is going to include the pedway connection to
    The Lois Hole Provincial
    Park in their 2010 budget. (via @EnjoyCentre) #
  • A day of paternity. Do I get to be extra patriarchal today? #

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-06-14

  • Can I put 2 iPhones on one Rogers plan? I need the new 3GS. #
  • Reboot times – OS X server: 20 secs
    Windows 2003: :1 min #
  • Early AM means early PM. Oil change, a stop at Rogers and then home for some vino #
  • Microsoft Sharepoint looks good on paper but I have my doubts about it’s reality. #

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If its about copyright, then plagarizing is ok

Oh the irony:

In May, the Conference Board of Canada recalled three reports advocating tighter copyright rules after University of Ottawa law professor Michael Geist charged that the reports borrowed heavily from, and in some cases plagiarized, previously published material by the International Intellectual Property Alliance, a music, movie and software lobby group. More…

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-06-07

  • Bordeaux is a world heritage site: who knew? #
  • Staff meetings eat time. Sometimes I’d rather have a memo. #
  • I’m not saying I would sell my 17 year old, but if I was, I wonder how much I would get? #
  • Microsoft’s new Natal controller… SWEET! #
  • Who will me the bigger man. It’s the eternal question that, gender aside, makesuch of our society function #
  • Going shopping for property. When did I get so high- falutin’? #
  • French wine and Vietnamese? Oh well one must make do. #
  • Learning Spanish grapes. Who knew there was so much I didn’t know. Tempranillo etc. #

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Life Update…

A note on the state of the universe:

1 Europe 2009
Well it looks like we will be travelling to Europe again this summer. Same crew as before (apparently Carmen is a glutton and Zak hasn’t yet decided to cut the cord). The itinerary is as follows:

Fly to Paris and spend the day (Carmen wants crepes here) and I missed the d’Orsey. Catch the 8:00pm Trenhotel to Barcelona arriving at about 8:30 am Sunday morning.

A note to other Canadians (and North Americans) courtesy of The Man in Seat Sixty One. There can be some severe differences between the ticket prices you can get on the French train site ( and the Canadian equivalent. For 4 tickets it was somewhere in the neighbourhood of $1200. That was more than enough to bump me up to first class with a shower and still be ahead of the game. Just remember not to choose “Canada” as your location. If you choose Great Britain you will be redirected to That will allow you to read the booking in english. Then you can just go ahead and book in the french site and pick up you tickets at the station.

It is possible to have you tickets booked to pick up in France and remain in the english site, but I can’t duplicate the procedure every time. Sometimes it just kicks me back to the French site.

As another side note, Mark Smith (the Man in Seat 61) is awesomely helpful and his site is even more so. Check it out! A funny story: I had managed to break the internet… It seems by booking and not carrying through with paying for my tickets so many times trying to figure the system out and get the seats I wanted I managed to overload the sncf booking system. I fixed so I could not book the tickets from any of the sites. I was unsure if It was me, Canada or the site. After a week or two I emailed Mark for advice and he checked it out. They must have straightened it out because it worked for him and I was able to complete the booking, but for a while there I’m a afraid I inadvertently fixed it so you couldn’t book any foreign trains…

So Barcelona. The upside of all this is, we supposedly arrive in Barcelona rested, showered, fed and raring to go (first class includes dinner and breakfast as well as two 2-person cabins). I’ve read conflicting reviews about whether sleeping is actually possible on the trains so we’ll see. Luckily we’ll be exhausted from the flight so it should work out.

So far we figure Sunday and Monday in Barcelona and leave Tuesday a.m. for Figueres. The rest of the day Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday we explore Costa Brava out of Figueres. Then Thursday evening we head off to Narbonne (in France). This is because I can’t make the schedule work to get us to Montauban early enough on Friday if we leave from Figueres. Friday we get up, hop a train to Toulouse, and then transfer to Montaubon where we head on down to the boat base.

This year we’ve booked an Asteria for the trip and it is again 11 days.

We will travel from Montaubon to Le Mas d’Agenais, with (hopefully) a side trip to Nerac. The trip is labeled the The Delights of Aquitaine Cruise. Hopefully it will live up to its name.

Disembarking in Le Mas d’Agenais, we taxi to Marmande and hop a train to Bordeaux for two nights. Then it’s back on a train for a couple of days in Paris and Versaille (at last) before we come home.

2 Condos
Well L and I have been looking a property for years now and hemming and hawing about investing. When C started looking at condos we tagged along and Greisbach sort of struck a chord with us. So… we’ve decide to buy a townhome in the Terraces of Griesbach. At this point we fully intend to keep the St Albert house and are not 100% sure we will move into Greisbach when its completed (a year from now).

Celebrating the decision with a glass or two at Tzin

But what we have are options — which is good — and what I feel is a solid investment. Zak is up in the air about his future after High School, so this gives him some options too. Other than that, it is as scary as shit, but at least we’ve regained forward momentum.

3 Climbing
What with Zak working and the weather sucking, we’ve done no outside climbing this year and the prospects look dim. Hopefully I will have money left after Europe to go back to Squamish but it’s looking pretty iffy. On a positive note, the gym is going well. I’m flashing 5.10+’s and working 5.11s. Now if I could just get on some rock… Any new partners out there?

Well thats all for now…